Satanists

I recently have been converted to Satanism. It was actually quite fun and didn't involve virgins (they don't exist any more) or blood. The conversion process involved delicious uni from a fine sushi establishment, vodka Gibson’s on the rocks from a reputable piano bar, and finally Budweiser and pot. I think that was Anton Levay's method. From what I summed up from this night of excess is that Satanists are unapologetic for their hedonistic lifestyles. Sign me up. It is also sooooo hipster bullshit chic to claim that as a religion. Way cooler than being a Jedi.